Imagine a Tupperware® Party.....but WITHOUT THE TUPPERWAREAt 7:32 PMby: Hiro

Looks can be deceiving

Ok, this one is for all you guys reading this. Well, girls can read on too but well, according to my research, most of you already know what I'm talking about. Well, I guess not the younger ones. At least I hope not.

Let me preface this by saying that I deserve some sort of a medal. A majestic city in my name. The Nobel Prize should be valued as worthless as a Kinder Surprise toy in contrast. I believe that I am now entitled to belong to the highest echelon of society. I should be revered and respected a thousandfold more than all of the world's greatest men in all of its history. My mere presence alone should humble all those who are fortunate enough to have me in their company.

Why am I entitled this honour you ask? Because I am going to single-handedly reveal a mind-shattering truth that is unbeknownst to quite possibly the entire male species. Aeons in the dark, I can now shed some light for the other half of the world.

Today, during one of my usual chats with 2 of my (awesome) roommates - Amanda and Kat - the conversation took an interesting turn that led to quite the shocking revelation.

Never in the perverted parts of the deep recesses of my mind have I ever fathomed such a concept.

So imagine a tupperware party. You know, like they had in the 60's and 70's. All the housewives went to them. They talked about how they'd use the tupperware. They sold tupperware to each other. By Golly, they sure were popular. I mean, tupperware is a godsend and what better way to spend an afternoon with the ladies and socialize while buying tupperware?

So they kinda faded into the pages of history and tupperware parties are no more.

Right?

WRONG.

In fact, they're as popular as ever.

Except now...it's without the tupperware.

Well, see for yourself. I present to you: the Fantasia Home Party.
(WARNING: DO NOT CLICK ON THIS AT WORK)

What do they do at these parties? Well, I don't think I can summon the words to describe such lurid unmentionables. Go to the site and see for yourself. It's a tad...naughty.

So now you're saying, "Wow what a letdown, it's not very shocking that they have parties like that." Oh no, it's more than just that. It's the fact that most (over 70% according to my terribly inaccurate survey) girls have at least heard of them, while a number (anywhere from 10-40%) of them have been to one, or at least been invited to one. They start as early as high school!

And how many guys I asked knew about them? 0.

Ok allow me to paint you a picture here to put things in perspective. So there are all these whacko cults out there like the Church of Scientology, and the Freemasons (you know...the Masonic Temple people). But everyone's heard of them. Sure, they're secretive but we at least know they exist!

But with this, it's as if half of the world belongs to a clandestine, underground cult and the other half doesn't even know of its existence! Isn't that a bit eerie?

This has been a totally life-changing discovery and I must say, it has totally changed my outlook on life and my perspective on television, sports, academics and even cheap wing nights! The fingers of corruption have left nothing standing in its wake, not even sparing my morning oasis of 2-egg/2-toast breakfasts!

Well, no longer shall the men of this earth walk blind, deaf, and oblivious.

Set forth my young disciples, and proclaim the truth.